Monday, January 5, 2009

Yeah. So I went back to "work" today.

You know what I think? No? Well I'll tell you then. I think that the first day back from vacation should also be a day of vacation. Because it is utterly impossible, it seems to me, to get back in the groove anyway. So, for example, when the first day back is scheduled to be Monday Jan 5, it should actually just be Tuesday, Jan 6. That way I don't have to start my first day back at work, at the start of a brand new year, feeling guilty for getting nothing done. What kind of a way is that to start a year? It's totally counter-productive! Now I'm just going to feel guilty all night, which means I may sleep badly, which means tomorrow might also be non-productive because I'm too tired! See? If corporate America just listened to me, we'd all be much better workers. We'd get our vacation, then we'd get the extra day to psych up for the end of vacation, and THEN we'd go back to work. And then we'd all work super hard that day, making better products that everyone would want to buy, stimulating the economy by putting more money back in circulation, which would help scoop our country back out of the toilet and on the road to prosperity and joy again.

Or, to rephrase this blog post in a totally different way:

I'm sorry I played Bejeweled at work today. It won't happen again.

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now if Popcap released a game that used animals instead of jewels, you could say you were doing very important research!

Anonymous said...

lol. I ended up answering 1 (count 'em... ONE!) email and that's about it.

Anonymous said...

I think you should've played Peggle instead. That way, you could say that you were researching how animals interacted with silver balls and orange pegs.

Unknown said...

Definitely agree with you.

Macroe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Macroe said...

Hey, at least you are finally free of doing those silly lists like the Top 51 Best Characters for the corporate overlords at Ziff. Gotta get more page clicks Jeff...

Peggle and Bejeweled seem to be your "relax" games of choice over the past couple of years. I'm just wondering though, what game will deserve the official and much coveted Greenspeak Award for Game of the Year?

The industry is still waiting for your verdict Sir.

Unknown said...

Yeah, returning to work after a vacation is a drag. The only way I can do it is my job is easy and I can listen to podcasts and music while I do it. Actually, returning to work for me isn't that bad. :P

Anonymous said...

It would be better if you didn't get any vacation at all. That's what happens when you work for the really shitty websites.

For some reason I keep having irrational fears of EA downsizing your position lately. I don't know why.. I'm just scared Jeff!

Jeff Green said...

Well, you and me both, friend. On the other hand, I'd have a lot more time to play bejeweled! LOL? :(

Ryan said...

Jeff, you're a wonderful columnist. If you're out of a job at EA, there'll be scores of your readers eager to hire you.

Hell, if you know how to code and you get fired, might as well work on a mod and apply for Valve :p.

Unknown said...

Jeff,

I don't think you're supposed to post that kind of thing on the internet. Unless it's research.

Bejeweled with animals instead of jems?

Anonymous said...

I got a memo today stating that we're not allowed to use post-it notes anymore - how in the hell are we supposed to communicate with one another? What, actually start up a conversation, or write an e-mail? Screw that, I like to see how many post-it notes I can stick on the office equipment of my colleagues before they finally notice. In fact, I suspect that the memo was aimed at me specifically. Yeah, whatever.

First day back to work is no big deal for me since I rarely work when I'm at work anyhow.

What I do remember is the first day back from Christmas break... from when I was in high school.

Even now, after all these years, I have this recurring nightmare in which I'm back in high school again, and it's just after the Christmas break or something, and I'm standing there in front of my locker, but I can't remember the combination to the lock. Also, there's an examination in progress, and I'm missing it because I can't get into my locker.

Yeah, but what's really tiresome about this part of the year (besides the weather) is that we won't be getting another vacation until Easter.

Do you cats down in the USA celebrate Dr. King's birthday by taking time of from work? That's at the end of January, isn't it?

Damm, I wish that Canada had had a person like that who had gotten himself assassinated.

Thanks to Dr. Green for giving us this wonderful blog, which has so elevated our spirits on this fine January evening!

Fred said...

I scheduled a big upgrade for today, my first day back from a splendid 2 week vacation. It was torture. Thinking about Left 4 Dead all day, daydreaming about my new Xbox, and what my WoW character must be drinking while sitting in the inn awaiting my return. I shoulda just stayed home and played. GTA IV.

Anonymous said...

Oh my god... look at what I wrote.. 'time of from work..."

I meant to write time 'off' from work obviously.

God I hate ti when I make mistakes like that. I need a copy desk.

Jon Lynch said...

I will follow the Jeff Green corporate revolution.

P. Monk said...

I'd say the first day back to work/school is a corporate/educational retreat day. Come to whatever and just chill out, maybe have like 2 hours of work time.

Anonymous said...

Problem is, if the year started on Tuesday 6 January, that same feeling would be in place, but a day later.

I played World of Goo and Peggle on my first day back.

Anonymous said...

Someday somebody will invent a method how your conscious mind can do something else, while your body/brain is at work. Sort of like parallel processing. It'll be the best thing ever, maybe the worst at the same time.

"Honey, did you invent a doomsday device today at work that your boss is now threatening to destroy the world with ?"

"Don't know, finally got to level 98."

Unknown said...

I'm unsure how long your vacation was, but as a high school band teacher, I got two and a half weeks off. Yesterday was just about the hardest day ever. After weeks of sleeping in until 10:30, I suddenly need to be up at 5:30 again?? Fantastic.

Then there are the kids - I have them first period, so of course all they want to do is chat with their neighbor about what they did over break, nevermind the director who is already in a bad mood. Oh yeah, and there's a concert next week...

Oh well, at least that's why us educators get paid the big bucks.

Oh wait.

Unknown said...

Er, and I guess that should have been "we educators." Gotta show that I'm worth what I'm paid.

Slapshot said...

I can't play games at work, but that didn't stop me from shutting my door and playing some Peggle on my enV2 yesterday.

I was going through some serious gaming withdraw after having so much time off during the holidays.

Anonymous said...

"Damm, I wish that Canada had had a person like that who had gotten himself assassinated."

To another Anon poster, Canada has Louis Riel. Wasn't assassinated -- executed by the Government.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, yeah, I know all about Louis Riel - I actually was paying attention in grade eight social studies class (believe me when I say that it never happened again though).

The error in logic which you are making, however, is that, to my knowledge, we Canadians don't celebrate the birthday of Lous Riel?

But was his birthday in January anyhow?

The point is, my dear fellow, that what we Canadians really needed was some political figure who got assassinated so that we could all take the day off to celebrate his birthday.

He would only have been of use to us, however, if his birthday had fallen somewhere in between the months of January or February. My personal preference would have been for February - right in between the Christmas and Easter breaks.

Anonymous said...

Jeff I wish my dad was as cool as you. I don't get to play WoW or listen to Ratatat with my parents
:(

russeru said...

not sure if you know this already Jeff, but...

http://www.1up.com/do/newsStory?cId=3172156

'tis a sad day in the history of gaming. EGM and 1UP will be missed. ='[

SuperJames said...

Funny post jeff, With the podcast closing at 1up please blog more! You guys are great, an ex-1up podcast would be cool.

Stephen said...

I wouldn't exactly describe playing WoW as a 'cool' thing. Now, playing EVE Online is a cool thing.

And yes, the 1UP thing will be missed. What will I do with my time at work then? If there is still work...