Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Hello and welcome!

To my new online bloggy-type home! Yay! Pardon the mess, as I'm just setting up and moving in right now. Sorry about the smell, too. That's from a burrito I found in my pocket that I bought sometime last week.

That actually really did happen during my time at Ziff Davis, by the way, which I know because I recently found a notebook an old friend of mine kept back in the MacWEEK days called "Classic Jeff Manuevers," and that was one of the listed items. Other highlights include:

August 23, 1993
Accidentally sends instant message meant for me to one of our vice-presidents. The message was: "FUCK YOU."

September 23, 1993
Drops photo slide (that was already a week late) that we needed for a page layout into his coffee cup. Calls vendor and blames US Postal Service.

September 29, 1993
Drops empty bread basket into the soup cauldron at Specialities. Then asks, "Do I get something free for doing that?"

January 5, 1994
When asked to put ketchup on plate for french fries, he places the bottle of ketchup on the plate. He was not trying to be funny.

and so on and so on. I guess it's sort of flattering to have someone keeping a written record of all your screwups. Though maybe I should keep that list away from my new employers at Electronic Arts, or they may start wondering what kind of horrible mistake they made. LOL!

Anyway, so the purging of my office here at Ziff Davis continues apace. The stuff I'm finding in here would, like, literally boggle your mind. Strat-o-Matic baseball games. A Gunsmoke tie. A Black Isle Studios notepad. A 2400 baud modem.

Note to self: Next time you stay at the same job for 17 years, don't wait 17 years to clean it up once in awhile.

Also: Hi! I'll try to post a lot here, and you try to visit, mmmkay? Otherwise it's gonna be kinda lonely around here. K back to packing. Byeeeeeeeeeeee!


djongewa said...

Yay! Greenspeak lives!

Sokkratez said...

Cool deal, Jeff. Looking forward to hearing more from you here.

KindGalaxy said...

I still have that Black Isle Studios notepad as well, came with the Baldur's Gate 2 Collector's Edition.

Clifford said...

Hope you well here. You are always going to be our CGW Jeff no matter where you go.

Mittens said...

You'll always be king of the brodeo and the true lord of the rings to me Jeff. Best of luck!

CGW4Life said...

Good luck, Jeff. You and the guys always did a great job on the magazine. I'm sure you'll keep your new masters at EA happy.

TheDeviot said...

Good Luck at EA Jeff.

MrCHUPON said...

The Green. He lives. Can't wait to hear your finale on GFW.

Anonymous said...


Justin said...

Hooray! Looking forward to your blog posts and will be spamming F5 with great strength and vigor!

htiawe said...

There should be more people like you, Jeff. Then the world would be, well.. not prettier or without war and stuff but better. In that sick way that only fans of the Brodeo would appreciate.

B Smith said...

Whatever it is you're doing there at EA, have fun. Finding out you were leaving GFW was like having someone crap in my soup, but I guess it couldn't last forever, eh?

Tony said...

Huzzah! Sir Jeffery of Greenshire lives! I hope you can keep this blog up Jeff =)

Tim Douglas said...

Welcome to your new blog, Jeff. I'm sad to see you go, but happy to see you got an awesome new job!

Looking forward to this week's brodeo - I hope there's copious amounts of your "crazy radio announcer" voice (aaaand we're back!) applied throughout the episode.

Ian said...


Davin said...

Yeah! Black Dragon rises again!

But what is it with you and misplacing burritos? You mentioned you forgot your Chipotle in your backpack on the 11/1/07 GFW Radio too!

Anyway, I hope that smell clears up and good luck to you!

Ronald Hayden said...

I have an idea: Mimeographed CGW done at night in your basement.

I'll be the visionary and you provide the work and words and stuff.

Could be big. Call me.

Booger Patrol said...

Greenspeak! It's like having at least one page from the magazine back again.

Konky Dong said...

The fiery, brilliant tips of the sun suddenly peaked over the horizon. The light found him in a strange land, vegetation and rock formations unlike anything he had ever seen sprung into his awareness. For a moment the nostalgia of his former home washed over him and he wondered what he was doing in this place. He squeezed his most beloved memento, a worn keychain emblazoned with the haunting visage of Louie Anderson, and assured himself that he had made the right decision. He breathed in deeply, and then prepared to make camp. This warm smattering of fields and hills would be his new home.

Esquire said...

Huge fan of yours from the podcast and magazine, and will be a constant reader of Greenspeak. Good luck at EA!

Xavier Garcia said...

Sweet! I added your blog to my RSS.

Looking forward to hearing about your EA adventures and so forth, plus its always cool to see somebody make the transition from being a member of the press to being a developer, soon you'll probably be like "OMG WTF making games is hard".

Jacob said...

Brodeo forever.

Steven said...

we love you!!! I will check this everyday.

Dale said...

Hello and welcome to game development! Unfortunately, you're working for the competition.

Jon Stansel said...

Dude, I would love to have a Black Isle Studios mousepad. Awesome.

Ryan said...

Do post often. Have fun at the new job.

Anonymous said...

I second what booger patrol said. Always had to go to the back to read Greenspeak as soon as the mag came in!

Michael said...

Consider me subscribed, Jeff!

Look forward reading your adventures.

Jesse said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jesse Dylan said...

Jeff, of course we'll visit frequently. Look at all the comments on here already! You're an internet celebrity, like it or not. You're going to be a lot more "visible" than most of EA's employees.

And when I lampooned the hell out of Spore on Amazon.com because of DRM... I felt a twinge of guilt. "Jeff works for EA now, and I'm bashing EA."

Well, it can't be helped.

Harry said...

The Black Dragon lives on!!!

JT said...

The picture. Fucking epic!

sikki said...

Good times, Black Dragon has a new den :)

nate childers said...

Looking forward to your rantings and comments here! Please don't be a stranger to the Brodeo.

Jpetersson said...

I will visit your blog alot. You have always been the most interesting personality on Ziff for me. Hope your new job suits you well.

Gilberto said...

WOOT! At least I get to keep a tab on you now, mate. Now, get effing working on this fugly template!

revocelot said...

Add the CGW/GFW Radio podcast archive to the links!

The world needs to hear your sultry, old man Jewish radio voice!


Robbie said...

Awesome! Greenspeak in blog form! Are you sure it's still September? Because I could have sworn that I just heard Santa's sleigh fly over my house a few moments after happening onto this blog!

I'll be keeping up with you on here. Be a good boy and update.

Budo said...

He's alive. ALIVE!!!!

Shadou said...

...yeah, 2400 baud modem... sure you ever cleaned your office?

Jesse said...

Hey Jeff, I'm really glad you're writing a blog. Don't think I could stand to not hear from you now and then. That being said, you should check out squarespace.com. They're a pretty sweet way to get a nice blog up and running.

Kvalnir said...

Yay, glad to see you're new digs.

Toyboxx said...

Hire a midget to do your packing for you. It's amazing what they do with heavy boxes - it's like an ant that can lift 10 times they're weight, it's amazing.

Anonymous said...

Its so nice to know that intelligent life does live in the gaming world. It was such a pleasure to read and listen to you over the years, tragic loss...please show up at the brodeo every now and then to stop that commie bastard Elliot from droning on about the philosophical ramifications of his existence.

PS..tell Elliot to un-ban me from 1 up..i was drunk when I wrote that comment;)

Andrew from Australia said...

The podcast isn't going to be the same with out you Jeff dude. You and Shawn Elliott were the reason GFW is the most entertaining podcast on my subscription list. My 50 minute drives to work will have to go on with less laughs.

Good luck with your new career and thanks for the entertainment.

Anonymous said...

I created a Livejournal syndication feed...thing, if anyone is interested. It's "jeff_greenspeak" sans quotes.

Patrick said...

Hilarious stuff...

Anyways, you may have both my hetero and homosexual virginity if you like.

Andrew said...

Hooray for Jeff!

Matt said...

Has someone said this already? There are already too many comments.

Anyway. Gunsmoke rocked. And rolled.

Gunsmoke rocked and rolled.

My word verification word is paxtvqaq. A high-scoring scrabble word, that.

Bryan Fernandez said...

Good Luck Jeff on your new job. Il be checking your blog regularly too!

Skywarpgold said...

The return of Greenspeak! Woohoo!!!

Anonymous said...

woohoo!! Jeff's new blog.

Jomolungma said...

Sweet. Bookmarked, etc. Update this often, or else!

Anonymous said...

Sadface and such at this turn of events, but Jeff...have my babies.

PandaEskimo said...

That book seems really good. PDF please :)

Anonymous said...

Well I feel like an idiot. I've been listening to GFW/CGW for I don't know how long, and I never understand what "The Brodeo" meant until I clicked on the urban dictionary link on the blog.

Also.. my first computer came with a 2400 baud modem. It took so long to download Cindy Crawford jpegs, kids today just don't appreciate what they have!

Ken said...

Three cheers for the return of Greenspeak!

edu.reboucas said...

I'm so glad you're keeping a blog, Jeff. Totally tracked on my blogroll. Enjoy your new job at EA! Can't wait to see a Jeff Sim running around... :P

mario66 said...


Cecil Vortex said...

It's not every comments thread that includes the line "I second what booger patrol said."

(btw, just fyi, BabelFish translates that into German as: "Zweites I welches booger patrol gesagt.")


Jeff Bourbeau said...

Jeff Green! In the text-y flesh! I'm happy you didn't disappear.

protocolsnow said...

Jeff Green for president! Looking forward to reading your blog! :D

I AM JOHN! said...

Jeff, I've been meaning to tell you this since I found out about this new job of yours: if you don't make a Sim Xanthor, I'm going to be insanely disappointed.

Rudy said...

Goodluck at EA Jeff - you had a great thing going with the folks on GFW Radio - best of luck with your new gig!

Anonymous said...

sad to see that you are leaving 1up, GFW will be so different with no more "AAANNDD WE'RE BACK!"'s :(

but! i also happy to see that you are moving on to new and cool things. I hope you enjoy your new job and I look forward to reading your new blog. Its in my google reader already!

Matty K said...

We love you Jeff! We miss you Jeff! Well, at least we can still read your stuff and jump into your mind from time to time. (Scary stuff!)

It's really cool that Greenspeak has morphed into an actual blog. Let's just hope you update it more than once a month!

Jared Miller said...

Yay, Jeff! Glad to see the new blog up an running. Also, you have a Gunsmoke tie? Awesome!

revender said...

Got your blog to the top of my rss feeds.

Dtrescott said...

So is there a chance at a "Win Jeff's old office crap" contest in our near future?


DS said...

I'll be coming back often. By the way, '93 wasn't your sharpest year it seams =)

Good to have you back on the net Jeff. And good luck at EA

Glen said...

I will surely follow this blog.

And I don't normally follow these types of things...except for Shawn Elliot's Twitter. Those links make some funny reactions to Facebook statuses.

ShadowBoxer said...

Bromancing at the Brodeo will never be the same!

Alejandra said...

Jeff, congratulations on the new blog! Your loyal fan army is ready for your commands. Fuck Retronauts!... Ok, maybe they're your pals and all, but yes, you Sir are the cream on my burrito. By the way, how about you register the www.greenspeak.us domain? Way cooler!

Best Regards from Mexico.

Casey said...

I will follow you to the ends of the Earth, Mr. Green! Glad to see you're still kicking on the internet. Don't be a stranger.

mario66 said...

i noticed you are listening to Peter Gabriel. i reccomend you try out Vampire Weekend. you will like

...oh and my word verifcation was PRNNO ..lol

Chris Amarandei said...

I wish you would still be joining the guys at least for GFW RADIO (every single show :P)

i wish we could copy your brain and build an AI around it and enjoy your jokes for eternity.

god bless you and people dear to you.

Ackbar said...

Hoorah! Please keep this up!

xx-Thor-xx said...

yay jeff!!

yay EA!!


Please make appearances on the brodeo with mildly entertaining anecdotes about life at EA.

Anonymous said...

Yay, more Jeff!

William said...

It's great that you already have a new blog set up. Also, kudos for telling off that big-wig VP, even if it was by accident.

Erik said...

Consider yourself bookmarked Jeff! Cant wait to hear your last GFW Radio(got that sucks to type) tomorrow!

PolygonSlayer said...

Good luck with the new job, thrilled for ya!
Gonna miss hearing you on the podcasts tho.. :/

Derek said...


Anonymous said...

Great sense of humor as always. Good luck with everything, and I plan on reading about the "The Life and Times of Jeff Green" often. By the way, I went through some of my old papers recently and found a gift certificate for a company that has been closed for 12 years. Guess I should probably have cleaned up sooner as well

Anonymous said...

P.S. Now you can make that Scorpion Slayer game as well. I need more scorpions to slay.

xpr said...


Anderson said...

Jeff Green, you're my hero. Keep posting.

Robert said...

I really do hope you keep this thing more lively than your other attempt of Greenspeak over at 1up. Looking forward to hearing from you alot. Keep us posted!

And again best of wishes for your new job. :)

joshua james said...


Pepper_ROni said...

Glad to see were still gonna here from you even though you work at EA now.

Simon said...

Heya Jeff! Keep on truckin'

BlueRook said...

I am a longtime listener of the Brodeo, and loved GFW magazine.

I look forward to this blog, and hope to see plenty of posts.

deadpixl said...

Glad to see you here! I was worried you'd stop blogging.

Ben said...

You've been bookmarked! Woo! What an honor!

quicKsand said...

I'll be checking out your blog, your a funny guy!

BadCandy_Confirmed said...


Where you go, I will follow. Please make it a good and long Brodeo today.


Curt C. Smith said...

Now that you're no longer at Ziff- I'm going to be really sad to not hear your voice on the GFW podcast. You should continue podcasting if you have the free time- I'd actually pay money to hear your take on videogames once a week. :)

F16Freek said...

Just wanted to say thanks for not abandoning us! And you just received +1 to "blog readers".

krunk_rite said...

Hope everything goes well. Keep us posted!

halojones-fan said...

My God, I can practically hear you reading this in my head.

Hey, I remember reading CGW back when Doom was the new hotness and the magazine advertised porn in the back pages. Good times, man, good times, back when 640k was enough for everybody and "Windows" was something you quit out of when you wanted to play games. There was no Internet; there was Prodigy and Compuserve and AOL. FPS as a genre hadn't taken off yet, and the RTS was a gleam in Westwood's eye; Flight sims and Wing Commander clones were the order of the day.

Would I go back there? Hell no, man, my personal heaven is the 1980s. But you have to allow an old man his nostalgia. (32 years next month.)

MSUSteve said...

Jeff, if you never make another post, that list of Classic Green Maneuvers was worth setting up the blog for. HILARIOUS!

xian said...


Sorcelator said...

ha ha, we actually had a note book dedicated to a friend of mine called "Kevinisums".

Jesse said...

I've had a similar screw up. While on Conference call on skype, with a major issue at work, I thought I was on mute and fired up COD4 which was blaring through my computer speakers. After about 10 minutes I notice the call has been ended and asked a colleague what the resolution of the meeting was. He replied "Donno, some guy was calling from Iraq and disrupted the call, so they rescheduled."

Mike said...

Great to see that Greenspeak lives. By the way, some of us might like to know what you had for breakfast, not lunch or dinner. Think about that next time, mister.

Thanks for the laughs, Jeff.

Bobby Phillipps said...

What's funny is that I can actually hear Jeff's voice, the voice of GFW Radio, saying out loud "My new bloggy-type home!" It makes me a happy man. We'll miss you and your brodeocity...some....ness...stuff. I've bookmarked this, though, so you have yourself a regular reader. :D

madkiwi said...

good luck jeff. from another fan from the other side of the world.

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